Not Meeting My Goal
Today I would like to share a little about perseverance in the midst of not meeting your goals. As many of you know I’m training for a marathon which takes place next month. I’m still excited and yet a little nervous at the same time. Thankfully I invested in a running coach early on because the encouragement has been essential on this journey. And quite frankly I’m not sure I would still be training with the life changes currently taking place.
From a very young age, I have been the kind of person who commits to whatever project or assignment given and I always see it to the end. However, I have had some life changes that have taken place over the last month, forcing me to shift gears more than usual. I applied for a new position and got it! Celebrations were due and had, however on the other side of that is I’m still training for a marathon, 26.2 miles! When I originally signed up I had no idea I would also be moving and driving up and down the freeway nearly every weekend transitioning to a new position (more about that in my Superintendent blog). So, I have had to drive four and half hours to interviews and to meetings within both of my districts at the same time while continually training. My amazing running coach has been increasing my mileage over time with some shorter weeks built in to adapt to my busy schedule. For instance, I had to run twelve, fourteen and eighteen miles, I even had an eight miler in there too. I have run each of the distances as required even if I had to take a break and walk… all except one.
The eighteen mile run took place a couple of weeks ago. It was on the forefront of my mind the entire week. I was trying to visualize my success and build mental resilience in preparation of the run. In my mind, I thought I had prepared correctly; eating my carbs, hydrating and resting when I could. The morning of, I got up early because I knew it would take some time. I began my run and I felt pretty good. I knew I had to pace myself because the goal was to run the entire thing. (The longest I had ever run was 16 miles so I knew I was capable of running this). As I knocked out my miles I felt good, I felt strong but around mile eleven, something was not right. I started feeling tired, my feet were hurting and my body just wasn’t feeling it. This is where disappointment started to creep in. But if you know me, you know I don’t quit, so I kept pushing.
I continued to push past the pain, but still was not feeling like I could complete my run. I called my coach while running and let her know what was going on. She knew I was exhausted mentally, physically and more. She told me to stop running and rest. I didn’t want to listen but eventually I did. I stopped at fourteen miles. Yes my body was tired but my pride hurt worse. I felt like I would not be able to run my marathon if I could not do my eighteen that day.
Reflecting on that day, I remember my coach reminding me of what was going on in my life, I was starting a new job, spending weekdays and weekends driving up and down the freeway as well as selling one home and buying another. She reminded how much of myself I was exerting in other areas of my life and that it is okay to rest! In the moment, I heard her but did not believe it because inside, I felt like a failure. If you know me I don’t ’not finish’ anything. Finishing what I started has been ingrained in me from early on in life. However, I am glad she made me stop and rest. I had to take some time for myself and reflect. As I think back through that run I’m still proud of myself for getting out to run in the midst of it all. I’m still proud of myself for continuing the training because I am going to run this race and finish this race. This is my opportunity to prove to myself, no one else, that I can do hard things. Am I nervous, absolutely but am I up for the challenge, definitely!
This coming week I have to run 20 miles, more specifically tomorrow! This will be the longest run before my race. I’m already working on my mental toughness and preparing my body for those miles. Yes did I have a very full week of work at my new job; yes have I been on my feet more than I should; and no I have not been able to rest as much as I prefer but I know I am capable of doing this!
As I continue this journey I will share more about the race as well. The marathon is in a few weeks. I encourage each of you to practice self care and find something that stretches you physically and mentally. Although I struggle through my runs at times, I feel so good when I finish. I truly believe that if I can do this I can do anything! Find a release that makes your body feel good as it will transfer to your mind and spirit and refresh you on this journey called life!
I can’t wait to tell you how my first marathon goes!
#EveryWomansMarathon
#RunningSupt
#InspireExcellence